Thoughts on healing

Interesting…. while we honor our mothers today, it’s important to also honor our own journey. The faults of others play out within our lives as we heal from childhood. Our mothers may not have been perfect, we may not be perfect as mothers, but we can continue on the journey of healing by accepting and releasing what does not serve us. It’s time to remove the cords that connect us to childhood perceptions played upon us by other souls also in the process of healing.

~Love to all~

Not enough

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Have you ever felt this, this being “not enough”?

Fear sits inside us, creating strain and stress for us, due to this concept of being “not enough”. We worry because we fear that we cannot do a thing required of us. We worry, we fear, because we have this message of being “not enough” playing in the back of our minds drowning out the music, the words, the silence that longs for us and calls to us from within.

What is “not enough”? Why does this feeling of lack plague us so? The ego is a varied thing. It is a fragile thing. It is an emotional thing. Like a storm, the ego can fly into a situation and wreck it. The ego gets hurt, it’s sensitive and it holds a grudge. The problem is that the ego, sometimes, deals with trauma and loss by echoing the trauma and loss back to it. It gets stuck in a loop, unable to remove itself from the boundaries of itself; spinning and spinning within the pain of the trauma until the body is damaged by the wild spinning energy… we are like a stone, and the ego when pulsating anger, pain and hate spins and spins until it wears us away; wears down our resolve and understanding.

To cope with this spinning, we turn to thoughts to escape the pain of this storm that we can no longer control, but which is a part of us none the less. And this thinking, it plays into the hands of our swollen ego, our hurt ego, our traumatized ego because it furthers our focus on it, by our intense desire to be away from it. It’s a polarity pull… we go one way to avoid a thing and the more we pull away, the more we draw ourselves near it. Escaping into thought merely ensures that we are still focused and fueling.

This cycle of “not enough”, the worry that we are lacking, plays out in our relationships with our partners, children, parents; it dictates how we deal with criticism, doubt, ill will. Our bodies begin to break down, we get sick, we get depressed, we get angry, we feel hopeless. Our bodies are playing and replaying the messages that our hurt and bruised ego are screaming. Stress, strain, pain, worry, lack of focus, lack of desire, anger… a deep pit into which we sink; a cypher of misery keeping us from our true self, from the history and messages that lie just beneath the ego.

The fear that binds us, the fear of being “not enough” is an illusion. Everyone one of us is enough. We all have exactly what we need to fulfill our purpose here. All of us, have divine within us; an ocean of deep dark divine lingering below the ego, below the pain, below the fear. This deep reserve of silence houses the secrets of our soul and our soul’s purpose on earth. It is our job here, to move through the ego so that we can reach the darkness within us. Our job is to move through the storm, through the pain, through the fear; knowing that the concept of “not enough” is false- an illusion, a falsehood given to us by our early experiences so that we could grow. We need to let go of the falsehoods and embrace the vast universe that lies within.

blessings and peace 🕉

True Love

When we talk about True Love, we are talking about listening. To LOVE is to LISTEN.

Voices from within call to us.
Our bodies call to us to listen to the messages stored inside our physical vessel, our feelings call to us to listen to our pain, our joys and our suffering, our perception calls to us- beckoning us to believe.

Learning to listen to ourselves is the foundation of listening to others. We need to be able to hear our own voices before we can hear the calls of those we wish to share love with.

Our capacity to love others is dependent on our capacity to love ourselves. Only when we develop the ability to listen to our minds, to our suffering, can we begin to love us… and our love for other people is dependent on our ability to self-love.

We must listen deeply to ourselves, for this is our TRUE HOME. Sometimes this practice is difficult; we are reluctant to go home because when we do this, we have to touch the pain, the suffering, the fear which is there.

To encounter true love in our life, we must find a way to go home which will not scare us. We need to find a way to go home with loving kindness and confidence. We need to find the courage to face the pain, the suffering, the fear with calm observation.

We develop this capacity to go home through meditation- stopping, calming, deep looking… to love, to truly love, we need to stop running and dwell in the present moment- in our home- for home is the here and now…

As we train ourselves to dwell in the present moment, we see things more deeply and our capacity of love grows more deeply. Suffering and pain may be in the present moment, but so is stability and peace and freedom.

Consider this: There are four aspects of love…
1- Maitri– loving kindness- offering happiness
2- Karuna– compassion- desire to remove suffering
3- Mudita– joy- desire to bring joy
4- Upeksha– freedom- desire to accept everything

When we embrace: our suffering, our pain, our silence, our home- and we learn to listen with an open heart, we grow our capacity to love. Within these four aspects of love- we create an environment of healing, joy and freedom for ourselves and for the objects of our love.

Objects of love can be varied. True love doesn’t grow just within your “soul partner” husband, wife or child- but can exist in many forms.

Love can be shared with ~ourselves   ~those we have sympathy for   ~those we are quite fond of   ~those we feel neutral about   AND   ~those we dislike.

When we consider the act of listening- to the self and to others- and when we practice the four aspects of giving love, we can develop true love for all beings (even those with whom we have carried ill-will for). When we let go, love self first through quiet listening, we can improve not only the love environment for ourselves and those we truly adore, but also for those who we dislike (as they may require our true love energy the most).

Come listen to more on True Love on Wednesday during my meditation share-
6:30-7:45 at 280 Main Street in Wethersfield, CT or email me for details.

Blessings,
Erin

12/12 portal

The 12/12 portal is an energetic doorway allowing intense, higher vibrational energy to flow both through the environment and through our personal bodies, minds and spirits. Now is a sacred time to rest, reflect and focus your heart chakras on abundance, love and healing.

During this time, our bodies, our environments and our souls are renewed and powerful energy is driven through our beings in an attempt to remove blocks, release trauma and re-invigorate our spirits towards a higher purpose.

Lightworkers, awakened beings, and instinctual animals are all able to band together during this time (now through the Winter Solstice on 12/21) to heal and transform.

Today think on the concept of unconditional love and allow that to fill your heart with divine light and understanding. Let go of lower vibrational ideas and emotions that hold you back and block forward progress… Remember that you are a spiritual being having a human experience- return to the light of love, gratitude and forgiveness; as these qualities will propel you to a new and more vivid understanding of your purpose in the new year.

blessings,
erin