This heavy energy of change just sits in the air around us. It is deafening and deep. It calls from within the heart, as she begs for relief, for a salve that might lighten the load; but where is the clarity that would turn darkness into light? Where is the understanding that may free us from this deep despair? Fear sits upon the floor of this wreckage, and wrings her hands. Even fear knows this darkness is too deep, even fear is fearful of the grief that lingers so within the folds of this energy consciousness we are enduring now.
My being is my kingdom; my divine mind the throne upon which I sit. Mindfulness helps me to remember the power of my own intuition and higher consciousness; though today, my heart ’s cries silence even my inner knowing- clouds of pain send forth cold and bitter rain. I am left here, to endure, to observe, to try to make some sense of the despair that covers my body and spirit in darkness and shadow.
Though now, I am left to wonder how long we are given to acclimate this new heaviness, which upon us now has descended; for within the acceptance of the present we may just yet find freedom from the bondage of it.
Many times, we must die to a new way; change requires it as payment from us. This load, this trial, this change we are now well within, is a death call. We must release from the old; loose our grip upon what we knew, what was comfortable, what brought joy so that we can allow it space to peacefully return to energy’s embrace.
I am lost to the difficulty of it; my entire being is crying in pain and loss…. I will not submit my heart to this; though ego’s firm stance will not be suffered by the wind of the storm that is brewing just off the coast of our consciousness and what ego demands, we cannot manifest now. What was, is no longer. We must rise up from the depths of our loss to embrace the new, the beginning, the alpha… and as the circle closes upon the old, we must let it go with gratitude and love instead of fear and pain. Oh, would that it was so easy!
Now, as ego, as this dying construct, starts to see death’s face upon the horizon, I am left here, with the trauma of letting go. Lacking courage, i summon my guides to help me meet this new day with an open heart. I ask for peace so that I may build my funeral pyre to the heavens as tribute to the past and gratitude for what it has taught me. My heart, so deafened by the sound of dawn’s bells ringing in the unknown, may just yet remember that compassion also dwells within the divine heart and she may take refuge within that embrace. I turn to face the shadows of these storm clouds with faith, even if my poor heart flutters and fear lies prostrate upon the floor, for acceptance affords the soul protection from the death of all things.